Ep 16: Why Everything You're Rejecting Matters

With each passing day, I'm dismissing several potentially awesome relationships. Declining hundreds of proposals to build incredible things. Rejecting countless offers to create memorable works of art. I'm saying no to infinite possibilities, by saying yes to only a few. Not just me - we all are. And it's why we must be excruciatingly selective about the people, projects and professions that are deserving of our time, efforts and energy.

Everything I'm missing out on is a surprisingly fascinating wonder. One that I often think about and weigh against what I'm working on - at any given moment. Though my mind does wander all over the place at times (blame the Type A syndrome), I do think there's value in giving care to everything we're turning down with every second spent elsewhere now. If there's a better benefit out there, why are we saying 'no' to it? Are there better relationships out there waiting to unveil themselves to you? Better ideas to be crystallized?

Undoubtedly.

There are golden nuggets hidden everywhere within the trillions of opportunities we're presented with daily.

We don't give many of them the time of the day. And how could we? We're only human. So we have to be absolute and resilient in where we put our energy and time. Energy is renewable. Time is heartless and irreplaceable.

The fact is, perfection is impossible, let alone subjective. Which means there's always a better idea or thing out there - one that we've likely declined in favor of another. If your focus could be more useful and valuable elsewhere, you'd got to drop what you're doing and go for it. Excuses are useless.

While I can't give energy to everything I'd like to, I find solace in knowing that opportunities are endless and boundless. You put a few people in a room over some good food and a conversation is inevitable. Conversations lead to discoveries, which lead to connections, which lead to new possibilities that didn't present themselves before.

Looking at what I am doing through the lens of what I'm not affords me the ability to judge the value of my creative energy from both ends of the spectrum.

It helps me not rest on my laurels for long and ensures that I'm working towards being at my happiest and most valuable. If I'm not investing in what I believe to be the best possible future, then it's time to entertain other venues by saying 'yes' to other adventures. Since my best possible future depends on other ideas and people, while I'm a planner to a fault, part of that plan is giving spontaneity the liberty to run rampant. For me, this means, being in energetic environments where exchanges are unavoidable (Meetups, parks, coffee shops, etc.). For you, that might mean saying 'yes' to something new each day - getting your Jim Carrey on with it!

So think about all that you're not doing - right now. Strip away vanity. Strip away self-validation. Strip away (mindless) entertainment. I'm talking about all the people, projects and professions you've being saying 'no' to. Could they help you be a better you? Could they be bringing you unabashed happiness? Could you be thriving and not merely surviving? Everything you're not doing could be just as important as what you are doing.

Do you have more confidence in each of your acceptances over your rejections? Or are you living with regrets? What do you think about all that you're not doing?